About balls and transvestites

Was it not Prime Minister Abdullah Ahmad Badawi who said that Malaysia is a country with first world infrastructure but third world mentality? Guess whom he was talking about.

NO HOLDS BARRED

Raja Petra Kamarudin

I receive quite a few ‘hate mails’ from various pro-Umno Malays accusing me of ‘takde telor’ and of being ‘pondan’. If directly translated to English, that would literally mean ‘no balls’ and ‘transvestite’. They are referring, of course, to my so-called ‘cowardly act’ of not being brave enough to face the court and answer to my criminal charges.

Many of those who sent me these hate mails give me the impression that they are the unfortunate recipients of a Malay education. And that is why they have limited brain capacity. These types of people are not trained to think beyond the narrow education and outdated upbringing they were subjected to. It is actually quite entertaining to receive these hate mails from these Malays because it helps reinforce the suspicion I have that they are way inferior in mentality and that ten of them combined can never out-think me.

I mean: it feels great to know that you are smart and they are stupid, don’t you think so? And the current education system is just churning out more and more stupid Malaysians and the fact that many of them will no longer be sent overseas because the country no longer has any money for education with the palaces and white elephants that we have to build further assures me that I shall remain smarter than these poorly educated Malaysians.

What is the fixation that the Malays have with balls and transvestites anyway? Why must everything be measured in terms of balls and pondan? Why must every statement these Malays make be about the size of your balls, and whether you have any or not, and whether you are a woman trapped in a man’s body? All the hate mails I receive from these pro-Umno Malays appears to be about just those two things -- balls and pondan. Why can’t they send me e-mails about other things than just about telor and pondan?

I realise that the most popular TV shows are those featuring pondans. Malays roar with laughter and roll on the floor in stitches when they watch these TV shows of men dressed up as and acting like women. Somehow it really tickles them silly. And if you cruise the back lanes of Kuala Lumpur (or even Kota Bharu) you will find many Malay boys dressed up as girls waiting for Malay men to come pick them up.

Is this why these pro-Umno Malays always send me hate mails about balls and pondans? Is it because many Malays somehow have this fetish about boys dressed up as girls? It really makes me wonder. But I would not have given too much thought to it if not for the fact that all the hate mails I receive seems to be about telor and pondan. Surely it can’t be a coincidence that all these pro-Umno Malays send me hate mails about this same thing.

Another favourite phrase these pro-Umno Malays use is ‘cermin diri sendiri’, which translates to ‘look at yourself in the mirror’. They always tell me: cermin diri sendiri. This is a sort of superiority complex statement meaning you are not pious enough, religious enough, sincere enough, brave enough, educated enough, knowledgeable enough, and so on. In other words, since you are not, then they are. It is like saying “I am better, smarter, more knowledgeable, more educated, etc., than you”.

This one really tickles me pink. They start off by accusing me of having no telor and of being a pondan and then end by suggesting I look at myself in the mirror. But this is exactly a reflection of what they are.

They fear getting rid of the New Economic Policy and still hide behind Ketuanan Melayu because they have no balls and are too pondan to compete in the open market. They know they are failures and that they will fall flat on their faces without protection and crutches. So they will take out their little curved knives and scream, rant and rave and constantly threaten those who oppose the New Economic Policy with another ‘May 13’.

None of these pro-Umno Malays who send me these hate mails accusing me of having no balls and of being pondan dare compete in the world. They insist that the Malays be given special rights and privileges and threaten the life of those who dare suggest that these rights and privileges be abolished. They foam at the mouth as they wave their little curved knives because they are scared stiff that their special rights and privileges are withdrawn and they would be seen for what they are: failures who can’t make it unless they receive protection and crutches.

And I am the one who is a pondan and who has no balls? And I am the one who needs to cermin my face? As I said, that is the problem with those unfortunate enough to have received a Grade C education.

Was it not Prime Minister Abdullah Ahmad Badawi who said that Malaysia is a country with first world infrastructure but third world mentality? Guess whom he was talking about.

Oh, and please keep sending me those hate mails about me having no telor and of being a pondan and so on. Yes, you know whom I am talking about. These hate mails make me feel good. It makes me feel superior when I read those no telor and pondan messages you send me because I am able to reassure myself that I am a cut above you.

I just love it when the pro-Umno Malays who need crutches and protection like the faggots that they are send me e-mails questioning the size of my balls and suggesting that I am a woman trapped in a man’s body. They certainly are candidates for a serious case of needing to cermin diri sendiri.