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Tuesday 23 February 2010

Let’s talk cock today

Do you know that 7,000 people die every year without fail on Malaysian roads? That’s 7,000 in a population of just 27 million people. Do you know that 2,700 people die every year on UK roads? That’s 2,700 in a population of 72 million people.

NO HOLDS BARRED

Raja Petra Kamarudin

International gathering of Muslim experts to discuss caning of women

An international Islamic conference would be held soon to discuss whether it is the norm to cane Muslim women found guilty of committing offences under Syariah law.

Women, Family and Community Development Minister Senator Datuk Seri Shahrizat Abdul Jalil said she hoped the conference, to comprise Islamic experts and ministers from Muslim nations, could be convened within three months.

“I will bring this up with the Cabinet soonest possible,” she said, adding that her ministry, through the Secratariat for the Defence and Empowerment of Women, would organise the conference and the venue would be confirmed later.

Ulamak and NGOs (non-governmental organisations) would also have their forums at the conference, she said after signing a memorandum of cooperation between her ministry and the Sultanate of Oman’s Social Development Ministry on Monday.

On a question by a reporter on whether such debates would create tension, Shahrizat said, “We should not fear debating any issue.”

She said that Syariah laws, when implemented with wisdom and fairness, were “the most beautiful laws” in the world.

On concerns over differences between the various Islamic denominations, Shahrizat said these denominations should learn from one another and she herself would be interested to learn from other Muslim countries.

Asked whether women were caned in the Sultanate of Oman, its Social Development Minister Dr Sharifa Khalfah Al Yahyaeiyah said the country adopted Syariah law as the main law of the country and the issue of caning did not exist because women and men were not caned, whether under Syariah or civil laws.

“As a moderate, progressive and modern country, women and men are treated equally under the law,” she said.

When women or men committed illicit sex, they were imprisoned for a year but not caned and when a person murdered another, he was not only jailed but also had to compensate the victim’s family, she said.

On Feb 9, three Muslim women, aged between 18 and the mid-20s, became the first women in Malaysia to be caned under Syariah laws for engaging in illicit sex.

In July last year, the Kuantan Syariah High Court sentenced part-time model Kartika Sari Dewi Shukarno, 33, to six strokes of the rotan for drinking beer, but the sentence has yet to be executed.

The ministries of the two countries would cooperate in fields such as women family and children development, senior citizens and people with disabilities, as well as gender studies, said Shahrizat. – The Star

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The Star news report above is as confusing as they come, which is quite normal when it comes to statements made by Malaysian ministers or news reports by government-owned propaganda outfits that masquerade as mainstream newspapers.

The issue here is: are there or are there not Islamic laws in existence, also referred to as Shariah laws? If there are, then what do these laws stipulate?

Muslims who propagate Islamic laws say that these laws already existed since the time of Prophet Muhammad. And they would of course quote various ‘undisputed’ sources to support this view. But that is the Islamist view of course. Historians who refuse to be clouded by religious doctrine but would base their opinions on documentary evidence would dispute this view. They would argue that the Shariah, in the form we understand it today, did not exist yet during the time of the Prophet but was developed as it went along over hundreds of years after the death of the Prophet.

Nevertheless, this is not the objective of my article today. I will leave it to the religious scholars and historians to fight it out and come to an agreement, or continue to disagree, on the origin of the Shariah. After all, history is always written by the victor, never by the vanquished. So the history of the Shariah would also be subjected to the same ‘standards’. The ‘official version’ of those who won the argument 1,000 years ago would prevail while those who lost and were put to death would have their version wiped out.

What The Star reported above, which is quoting a Malaysian minister, gives the impression that there is much uncertainty about what Islamic laws stipulate. Would the Christians need to hold an international conference to discuss what ‘thou shalt not steal’, or ‘thou shalt not commit adultery’, or whatnot, really means? The Christians are clear in their minds as to what Christianity is all about. The Muslims need to hold an international conference to explore what Islam really says.

Let us make it simple. Is drinking beer forbidden or not? Is extramarital sex forbidden or not? What does the Quran say about these matters? And what are the punishments as laid down in the Quran?

What is so difficult about this? Either it is in the Quran or it is not. And if it is in the Quran then surely the Quran has made clear what must be done about the matter. Why complicate matters by holding an international conference 14 centuries after the death of the Prophet and argue till the cows come home?

I can assure you the participants will never come to a consensus. Since the day the Prophet died Muslims have never been able to come to a consensus. What makes you think that now they will, just because someone from Umno who is on the last days of her political career is trying to salvage her career by organising a ‘landmark’ and ‘historical’ international conference that will save the entire Muslim world -- or so she imagines.

Okay, Shahrizat said, “We should not fear debating any issue.” I can bet your sweet ninny that this is absolutely untrue. All it needs is for one overzealous officer from Jakim or Jakun or whatever to make a police report and the very next day the police will be in front of your house to detain you for ‘insulting Islam’. Trust me, I make a living by getting detained for ‘insulting Islam’.

Discussing Islam can be considered a crime of insulting Islam if Umno says so. Even discussing the Federal Constitution of Malaysia and certain Articles in that Constitution is a crime if Umno says so. Umno and not Prophet Muhammad decides on what is right and what is wrong. And Umno can even rewrite the Quran -- figure of speech of course -- if they want to. And going against what the Quran says does tantamount to rewriting the Quran in that sense.

Forget about the matter of consuming beer or fornication. Let’s go to one very simple and basic issue. Let’s talk about the tudung or headscarf for women. In Malaysia it is optional. You can choose to wear it or you can choose not to wear it. In Saudi Arabia it is compulsory. Even non-Muslim women must cover their heads. In Afghanistan they will cane women who appear in public with their head uncovered. And in Turkey they ban women from covering their heads. Universities and Parliament bar women with their heads covered from entering the building.

That is not yet the more complicating issues. That is only the most simple and basic issue. So which ‘Islamic system’ is the correct one? Can the Honourable Minister please enlighten us? Or will she first call for an international conference to discuss the matter of whether women must cover their heads, must not cover their heads, or its up to them if they want to cover their heads or not.

Are beer and extramarital sex that important an issue? So they drink and they fornicate. Who do they harm other than themselves? I am sure many also smoke as well. Is not smoking maybe more damaging to their health than beer or sex? You may indulge in extramarital sex once in awhile, and use a condom when you do. You may drink on Saturday nights. But you smoke from the time you wake up from sleep every morning and smoke two packets a day.

The sex will not kill you if you are protected and if you make sure the husband does not catch you. The Saturday night beer will not kill you unless you drink and drive. But your smoking will for sure. Should not smoking be banned and those who smoke be punished, maybe by caning?

Before the Islamists jump on my case and accuse me of saying that we should legalise beer and extramarital sex for Muslims, what I am saying is why single out certain anti-social behaviour while ignoring others that are more harmful? Why target beer and sex but not smoking when smoking can be worse for your health?

Anyway, why even bother to clamp down on anti-social behaviour that harms only those who indulge in it but no one else? Should we not focus on anti-social behaviour that harms others? You smoke and you die; that is your problem. You drink and you die; that is also your problem. You screw around and you die; that is also your problem. But you detonate a bomb and I die. That is not your problem. That is my problem.

Do you get my drift now? The operational word here is prioritise. Tackle the main issues. Tackle those issues that hurt society. What you do with your body is your business.

Do you know that 7,000 people die every year without fail on Malaysian roads? That’s 7,000 in a population of just 27 million people. Do you know that 2,700 people die every year on UK roads? That’s 2,700 in a population of 72 million people.

Now, are road deaths not as important as beer drinking or extramarital sex? How many people die from drinking beer? 7,000? How many people die from extramarital sex? 7,000? But 7,000 die on Malaysian roads and many of these deaths are the fault of others.

And why do 7,000 people die on Malaysian roads while only 2,700 die in the UK although UK’s population is about three times the size of Malaysia’s?

Elementary, my dear Watson! It is because of corruption. In Malaysia you can buy your driving licence. In Malaysia you can obtain a licence even if you can’t drive as long as you pay a few hundred ringgit. It cost just RM300-RM400 ringgit to kill each of those 7,000 Malaysians every year.

And corruption is forbidden in Islam. It is more serious than beer or extramarital sex. And the majority of those testers who take bribes are Muslims.

Should Malaysia not organise an international conference to discuss this more pressing problem and decide on what punishment we should subject these people to? We should cane these Muslims who kill 7,000 Malaysians every year -- maybe on their genitals. And I do not need to hold an international conference to come to this decision.

Aiyah! Why are Muslims so full of bullshit?

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